Little baby Levi dies...
Monday night I was watching a special on "sports science" when the phone rang. It was my cousin, phoning to inform me of some bad news. She explained my step-brother was in a bad car accident, much was uncertain.
From the sound of her voice, it was apparent that she and other family members were very emotional about the whole accident. From what we know, it seems my brother was on his way home with his family, Wife, 18 month old son, and 5 year old daughter. They were traveling on a highway coming up to an intersection. Their light was green while the other truck, perpendicular, was running the red light.
The truck ended up hitting the driver's side, more towards the back seat of the vehicle. Baby Levi was on the driver side, absorbing most of the impact. My sister in law didn't break any bones but her brain does have a clot it seems. My brother cracked the back right side of his skull (behind the ear area) and was bleeding a lot. When the police officer arrived, he didn't think my brother would make it, as his eyes were glossed over and he was not responding well.
Their 5 year girl ended up climbing out of the car before the police arrived. She was for the most part in great condition. Baby Levi, seemed like he was a sleep. But the truth of the matter is his brain had excessive blood in it from the moment impact. The officer mentioned the baby's heart might have stopped beating due to the impact alone. It was later though they found out the impact did much more than stop his heart. It left him completely brain dead.
The story gets sadder. The parents and baby Levi were life flighted to another state, and Levi was in a separate hospital (children's hospital) from his parents. The parents were not told of Levi's condition until a day later when social services told the children's hospital it would need to pull the life support from the baby, since he was brain dead and lifeless. Then the other hospital staff decided to tell Levi's parents, so they could at least see Levi.
A man's heart (especially being a parent) is bound to break when hearing a story like this. But what breaks my heart even more is to see my brother and sister-in-laws pain, questions, denial, bitterness toward God.
My brother was alone with Levi for several hours, given the burden to decide when to remove Levi from life support and if he wanted to donate Levi's organs. I spoke with him briefly on the phone and heard the pain in his voice and rage as well. No words came to mind to offer comfort or support. The only thing that came to mind was just to be there, next to him, hugging him - letting him know he doesn't have to walk through this alone. Speaking no words, just being there.
My brother has a lot of family around him. Lots of love and support - I am glad of that. But he and his wife's pain is so great - it's indescribable.
I have often thought, how much are we like God, or how much is God like us. Does he feel pain as we do? As more life experiences come my way I am convinced that God shares similar experiences as we do. Often what comes to mind is when God was grieved that he made man (Genesis 6:6), before causing the flood - to wipe out man kind. Then the scripture that talks about how God turned away while Jesus was being crucified, because the pain was too great to see his son die.
I read an interesting stat a few weeks back by World Vision, 15,000 children die daily, from dirty water. Does that not grieve God's heart? Or, all the murders and outright evil. Just as a father finds disappointed in his child, God finds disappointed in us. It seems to me indeed we are made in God's image - sharing emotions on a similar scale.
I wish it weren't so, I keep telling myself of my brother and sister in law's sake, I wish it weren't so... For this wreck to have happen. I find peace for them in this that God indeed has emotions like us, and that He has experienced loss, pai
n and disappointed, just as my brother is at this very moment.
A psalm is coming to mind as I close...
Psalm 121 - NIV
A song of ascents.
1 I lift up my eyes to the hills
where does my help come from?
2 My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.